Here are all the time-honored tropes in one convenient checklist
Everyone who entered and was brave enough to make a film in 48 hours deserves a review.
These movies are unique, horrifying, and dare to scare like so few do
Lowres Wunderbred’s Deconstruction series returns looking into the beloved and berated final Stanley Kubrick film.
“Italian horror doesn’t give a shit about your Protestant work ethic.”
“Haneke reminds us that humans are all damaged shitbags.”
“Eyes are kept open, lined with small needles, lest they blink and let loose the blood.”
LET’S GET WITCHY!
“You’ll be grateful for the nightmares.”
“Not recommended for: novice trippers, Reagan Republicrats, copywriters with ideals intact (both of you), nor especially RayBan-wearing dictators.”
“Eat the apple. Drink the drink. Eat the pot brownies from the wicked witch.”
“Occult horror blends with giallo-type murders into an unforgettable artistic nightmare.”
“CLASH wants your creepy stories!”
“Batman: The Killing Joke (directed by Sam Liu) is a film that, on paper, should have been dazzling and yet has found itself with a lack of support among fans and general audiences alike.”
“Green Room presents a stark depiction of brutal violence.”
“The Witch has some of the most compelling visual and thematic imagery that I’ve seen in recent horror, but it’s definitely not ‘Standard Horror’ and may be misleading to some.”
“The first half hour of ‘Anomalisa’ is funny and fantastic…”
“Tom Hardy is one of the most talented actors working. He could have had a cameo in Tommy Wiseau’s The Room and earned an Oscar nomination.”
“Alejandro González Iñárritu blew me away last year with his Academy Award winner for Best Picture, Birdman. Needless to say, ‘The Revenant’ had some big shoes to fill. The question is, did it square up to its predecessor?”
“Who would have ever thought that Rocky 6–excuse me, Creed–would be a major awards contender and potentially earn Sylvester Stallone another Oscar?”
“Let me just say this about ‘Star Wars: The Force Awakens’ in the least spoilery way possible… It fuckin’ stinks.”
“David Lipsky (Jesse Eisenberg) is a middle-of-the-road author and journalist for Rolling Stone who undergoes the task of doing a feature on Infinite Jest author David Foster Wallace (Jason Segel) at the height of his popularity. Based on Lipsky’s book Although Of Course You End Up Becoming Yourself, which detailed the five day encounter and was described as “…a road picture, a love story, a contest” by Maria Bustillos of The Awl, the film fails to capture that essence and, in effect, loses its footing.”
“So does this film compare to what it seemed to try to be a companion piece to? No, not really. But on that same note, I feel I should also say I don’t feel Cannibal Holocaust is a good film either. It’s shocking and disturbing absolutely, but once you get past that what is there? Not much. But this isn’t a review of Cannibal, it’s a review of The Green Inferno. A film that had good ideas in it, but much like the small Timothy Green, it just couldn’t grow to it’s full potential, and that in my opinion hurts worse than it simply being a bad movie.”