Why Is There Foam in My Pee? Questions WIth Dr. B

“Since the demon, or demons, are invisible it is nearly impossible to detect them in your food.”

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Chillin’ With Characters

“There are plenty of zines and lit sites that give authors a platform to talk about their favorite seltzer water and convince everyone they use a typewriter, which is great and all, but that’s not what this is.”

Enough of Food Trends: Let Pizza Die

“Food trends occur every couple of years and frankly, they’re pretty damn obnoxious. Why? Because you have thousands of people acting like they adore food products slightly more than they actually do and I just can’t take it!”

Ask Maddie: Bizarro Advice Column

“I was trying to invoke Satan and accidentally invoked the ghost of Margaret Thatcher instead. Now she’s bugging me, telling me about how privatizations can help my country. How do I get rid of her?”

How ‘Twilight’ Fucked, Saved, Made Me

“Like most boys I hated Twilight, and like most boys it wasn’t because of it’s lack of cinematic value. Saying ‘it’s stupid’ was just a front to cover up my true feelings about the popularity of the movie.”

IN CONVERSATION: The Funniest Man on Social Media – Rob Fee

“Rob Fee is one of the most talented comedy writers working. Odds are likely that if you recognize his name (or don’t recognize his name) you’ve read at least one article from him. More recently, he gained attention through his vocal criticisms of The Fat Jew’s joke thievery.”

You’re Probably a Piece of Shit, Just Admit It

“How often have you posted vague Facebook statuses or written tweets about people in your life you dislike? Not that often, right? Well guess what, if you have once–just once–you’re a piece of shit. You’re a turd. You’re a cretin and you deserve to know it.”

“Eats A Mean Pussy”

“… is what I successfully prevented myself from putting in the ‘special skills’ section of this job application I’m filling out.”