Peyton Manning’s No Huddle Offense Taught Me How to be a Musician

“Practicing won’t save you from tragedy. The more you play the worse you’ll sound because you’re playing more.”

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2018 NFL Draft Erotica

“He ripped off McShay’s clothes and tossed them aside like they were worthless seventh-round picks as both men traded up into each others arms.”

Writers Should be Like Sam Hinkie & Trust The Process

In professional sports there is ALMOST never a good reason to lose, and in writing there is never a good reason to write poorly. Both are the golden rules of being ‘successful’ but what if you need to lose to get better, and need to write some shit to get better? What if losing and being shitty is part of the process to become great?

The Christmas Poop of Catalan

“Whether you think Christmas is shit or Christmas is the shit, when you are Catalan, your Christmas is going to be full of shit. And I mean literally. And no, it doesn’t get that dirty (usually).”

Dwyane Wade Wants to Feel Wanted

“When the Miami Heat offered him a 2-year deal with a 50% pay cut to play for ten million a year instead of his usual ten million, it was his pride more than his pocketbook that got hurt.”

Kevin Love Poem

“Being a really tall and muscular white boy is better than being in a boy band in the late 90’s”

Dear Adam Gase

“There are two types of Miami Dolphin fans: one group that needs something to do on a Sunday, because they are still high on coke from partying Saturday night; the other is people who equate home, family, and regional pride with watching the Miami Dolphins on Sunday.”