They touch our bodies, in intimate ways and places, all before stripping away your nails with power tools.
Cartoonists are just disgruntled rock stars at heart.
I was someone for whom starvation gave me a sense of control that I lacked. Or, at least, it gave me the illusion of control.
Laura Diaz de Arce The Early Modern artist academies considered the human body the pinnacle of study. To study the body was to engage in beauty, in perfection. Which is funny, because human bodies are really fucking gross. No. Really. Gross. We sweat, we chew, we swallow, shit, piss, ejaculate, vomit, spit. We take material […]
Here are all the time-honored tropes in one convenient checklist
I’ve taken it upon myself to revive the celebratory art of wassailing.
We can tell ourselves it’s all worth it, because even though they will be crestfallen in the future, right now in the present we can see a five year old scream with delight because Santa Claus loves her and knows exactly what she wanted.
Bleak and oppressive in a way that only the post-hippy, head-trippy 70s could envision
Contrary to popular opinion Krampus is not Saint Nicholas’s shadow, nor is he the love child of Satan and the Greek God Pan.
I let each client unwittingly summon their own workout monster.
There aren’t really a lot of “mic drop” moments — though there are a lot of attempts at them.
**THIS IS NOT GOING TO BE INTERESTING** **I AM NOT GOING TO TRY TO MAKE THIS SOUND INTERESTING OR TRY TO MAKE YOU LIKE ME
They equate consensually created pornography and general sexual content with problematic and criminal activity.
Time was ticking away and I was riding the rush of fear and excitement of chasing the deadline.
CLASH knows you’re creative, so let’s share that awesomeness with the world!
Lots of times, evil is completely devoid of meaning, is stupid.
Strength. Focus. Purpose.
Carla Gugino, is the embodiment of bohemian-earth-mother-meets-ethereal-diva
There are a lot of ways to approach heavy metal. And it’s a sound that’s always changing.
How stupid would it be if he ruptured his L4-L5 disc while bending over to pick up his knife?
Monique is an exciting new voice in Latinx fiction.
Society often fails to see that addiction does not define a person, and sometimes, the person who is addicted lacks the ability to see that too.
You think you recognize this deal with the devil, but there’s another element at play
Perhaps Satan is lurking in all those terms and conditions no one ever feels like reading
These movies are unique, horrifying, and dare to scare like so few do
If in your first act someone speaks of the devil, then in the second the devil better rain brimstone down on everyone.
The Last Broadcast and The Blair Witch Project stand together as DIY visions of a better way for Americans to make horror films
We want to hear your horror stories, be they real or the product of your own twisted minds.
I could never predict what was going to ruin me and what was going to rescue me.
This game has it all: Vampire dykes who own goth clubs who send you to cleanse haunted mansions of demons.
“The Pre-Order Personalized Signed Copy will be limited to 200 which can be purchased on the CLASH Books site.”
It’s almost Buddhist – her detachment and rejection of material, hedonistic pursuits.
Maybe it started as an obligation to the U.S. government, but I’d like to think our relationship has progressed beyond that.
—there’s a part of you that wonders: I don’t know, maybe Bud knows some people with tigers in their veins.
At least when shit hits the fan I’ll have tomatoes.
You’ll find yourself asking the question: What have I done for love, and what would I do?
And you know, as much as I love this poem, I still don’t completely buy it when he says that shark attacks can’t love broken collarbones.
I love Arcan because her work inspires such a strong revulsion in many readers.
Everything that we are afraid to do; the anticipation or the fear of it is always greater than doing it. Even if it is something awful.
The term “genius” gets thrown around a lot but I definitely feel Chelsea Martin is genius as fuck.
Donald Duck would never do such a thing, place a pistol to his temple while grinning like a maniac.
“Absolutely Golden is a far-out tale that grooves right along.”
“Italian horror doesn’t give a shit about your Protestant work ethic.”
“Lucio Fulci’s The Devil’s Honey is lyrical meditation on violence, trauma, recovery and revenge through an S&M lens.”
“What I’m really fascinated by is this branding of the self, turning one’s own social media performance into a deliberate consumable item.”
“The truth is that I had all the opportunities in the world to sing and act, but I was too scared of failure, too busy comparing myself to my peers to tap into my own creativity.”
“Here’s a list of things you should do and be on the lookout for when it comes to sending someone your work.”
“Tanzer aspires to the coolness that comes with trying but making it seem like you’re not trying, which is exactly how good writing is, and one of the reasons that Be Cool feels so effortless to read.”
“Cicero’s poems show nature as violent and unforgiving.”
“It’s gross, violent, erotic, boisterous fun for a pretty non-traditional family unit.”
“The first time you think your chest is going to explode, it tends to take the fight out of you.”
“In 2006 Warner Bros. rushed a Green Lantern film into pre-production written by Saturday Night Live and Late Night with Conan O’Brien‘s Robert Smigel that would have starred Jack Black.”
“This game of treating women like auction block meat is older than Hollywood itself.”
“One woman even has a demon dog named Cerberus come out of her backside chomping away at her opponents. Hip Whip Girl forever!”
“No more CHRISTMAS SHIT for the rest of the night.”
“I paid the premium to sign off on everyday America because the manufactured rage of adulthood needs to be exorcised.”
“Plant magic has been an integral part of seasonal ceremony. Long before Christmas was decking the halls, it was exploring the inner caverns of our psyche.”
“These are stories for when you cry looking at a mirror and ask harsh questions about who the fuck is staring back at you.”
“When I was your age, mija, I had my heart broken by a beautiful man.”
“The presence of so much morbidity is both thrilling and unnerving.”
“Scenes of vaudevillian grotesquery abound in Trash Humpers.”
“Even if his first name is Santa, he’s no saint to me.”
“The Tarot is all about accessing your subconscious and conversing with it.”
“And here I was thinking Pulp Fiction was going to be your greatest cultural contribution.”
“I dreamed of white veils and black habits.”
“Small and dark and slanted eyed like me.”
“Your eyes bleed, your soul cries, but you can’t fucking stop.”
Halloween became a thing I wanted to nail in Kindergarten.
He’s reconciled the misanthrope and the romantic in a way that doesn’t feel uneven.
LET’S GET WITCHY!
“Humans are addicted to anxiety.”
“He was a rebel of his time.”
“You look exactly like your Facebook photos, and it’s making my stomach all mushy.”
“I know your mom stole your whole name from her favorite telenovela.”
“The bride told me I looked like shit. Then she laughed.”
“In the words of Brian Keene, please go die in a tire fire.”
“Easily the most bizarre conversation I’ve ever been a part of.”
“Aliens don’t give a fuck about you.”
“Applebee’s, golf, and Buffalo Wild Wings are terrible.”
“I have read Revelations almost 1000 times and when I saw Trump running I praised Jesus and got ready. I knew without a doubt this man had to be the Antichrist.”
“To fight, we need to believe in ourselves first.”
“She is not scared of owning her badness or her goodness.”
“More people need to wear a panda head when they do interviews.”
“Sorry KatyCats, I think I might have just switched alliances.”
“Even today, the original has lost none of its potency.”
“Charlottesville started a snowball effect.”
“It was a radtacular time.”
“These stories get under your skin.”
“Was it the latent sexuality of Fukunaga’s script that pushed Warner Bros away, or the Lovecraftian aspects that made it too abstract?”
“Palahniuk is himself a member of the Cacophony Society.”
“I think I was smoking a cigar.”
“I will recommend 5 books to prepare Martin Shkreli for his time in prison.”
“She looked at me, my tiny jeans falling off of my concave stomach, and then wrote in my copy of the book, “Baby Steps.”
“Now we finally get our own supervillain.”
“I think of the times I’ve cragged my legless body across razorwire, skin sloughing off as the napalm digs into me.”
“Your father has a devil inside him.”
“How cool would it be if you actually got Cher to do a poetry zine for one of the Ladybox releases?”
“It seems that Marvel Studios learned fast to pay it forward.”
“If you think every other author out there is your enemy, you can go fuck yourself.”
“Then somebody, I don’t remember who, started playing “I Wanna Be Your Dog” by The Stooges.”
“Come to Vegas and we can go to karaoke.”
“We’re a bunch of slanted-eyed brown girls watching wide-eyed white girls being chased by a killer.”
“A man lives with a parasite in him.”
“Actually, I’m a Pisces. A sad, aging emo boy in a sad, aging emo world.”
“We all smelled bad and dressed sloppy acted like we hated the place.”
“Dreams are often a strange equalizer.”
Take a trip to the METAL side of LIT
“Being on this podcast made me feel like I fell into some weird Loony Tunes wormhole.”
There is no such thing as fair during times like this.”
“I felt okay about being charmless. I was going to eat ice-cream.”
“I was a religious little boy and thought Guns N’ Roses were nothing but sinners and going to hell.”
“I can’t untangle my queerness from my politics or my magickal practice.”
“I picture myself as Lena Dunham with a beard.”
“When I finally decided to quit drinking I had anxiety about being alone.”
“I want to make shit happen.”
“No vampires, werewolves, and certainly no witches.”
“I am honored to play the role of Lieutenant Olivia Benson on SVU”
“I fought so long to plant a flag in something that never should have been disputed territory.”
“If you expend so much effort into being what other people desire it’ll leave you feeling empty.”
“Once he jumped on me while I was humping my pillow.”
“You can just imagine all those Chinese like a little army of yellow ants crawling over it, can’t you?”
“BRUJA is a fluid, non-linear, and organic experience.”
“I visit old people in their homes and help them with daily tasks, like cooking and cleaning and bathing.”
“When I think of people with mustaches, I think of my dad, Burt Reynolds, and cowboys.”
“You can probably read the book faster than an acid trip lasts .”
“Spring Breakers and Gummo specifically pop to mind.”
“Basically, Elizabeth Ellen should win the Pulitzer Prize and then immediately be beaten to death with it because she’s so good, so human, so completely fucked.”
“Hardcore fart song, bro. I liked it.”
“We loved Kerouac’s Mexico City Blues and Enzo wanted to read the whole book out loud. It took a long time because we got very drunk.”
“You made all of this happen with your book,” one Twitter user scolded me.”
“What does it mean to survive?”
“Old gods lurk behind the stars, old loves linger on from Earth, and Mars ain’t the kind of place to raise your kids.”
“Somewhere in between Donald Trump’s attacks on immigrants and his comments about pussy-grabbing, it became clear that public demonstrations and marches were going to become a regular part of my life.”
“All of my tattoos are reflections, more or less, of visions.”
“My grandmother made Christmas ornaments from dried apricots and sugar cookies that she baked with her own hands, a creation upon a creation. They were all tiny women, and she gave them dark hair like us, which felt like a gift to me.”
“Our abuelitas went to special masses and some of the nativity sets under our trees featured a baby Jesus that had slightly darker skin than the Jesus the gringos put under their tree.”
“Myself and my two older sisters were never exactly Little Women but we did our best not to hate each other.”
“Amongst his many deific duties, Murray plays poet and maharishi to the various extraterrestrial corporate entities that run our universe. He keeps them merciful.”
“Entertain us with your Christmas traditions and recollections.”
“When I saw the mall Santas I always knew it was a man in a suit.”
“The bad thing is here and action will be required, so learn to focus your anger and use it for good.”
“Our nation is a cracked mirror. You stare into the glass, hoping to find solace, but you are delivered more cracks.”
“What a surreal time to be alive in all the history of the world and be who I am.”
“On November, 11th 2016, the United States will hold its first presidential inauguration for a reality TV star.”
“I felt like I was outside myself as well as inside.”
“I grew up with a grandma who kept a bathroom full of candles for the dead.”
“I remember being so happy then—a creature that stayed out too late one Halloween night and got lost in the morning light.”
“Maybe New Orleans is like a drug, an opium-induced dreamspace.”
“The Swedish Academy is full of elderly individuals who are apparently too tired to read thick novels.”
“America, and by that I mean the United States because America is much bigger and full of non-US residents, was never great, but these kids deserve to grow up in a place that’s less divisive, less stupid, less racist and sexist and homophobic. “