Danger Slater Super Serious Interivew

Did you get bullied by crossing guards in high school?

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Writers Should be Like Sam Hinkie & Trust The Process

In professional sports there is ALMOST never a good reason to lose, and in writing there is never a good reason to write poorly. Both are the golden rules of being ‘successful’ but what if you need to lose to get better, and need to write some shit to get better? What if losing and being shitty is part of the process to become great?

Author Alexander Boldizar Interviewed by Christoph Paul

One of the earliest reviews I received said, “A full on satire of contemporary law as mesmerizing and complex as something lost from David Foster Wallace, yet as light in tone as A Confederacy of Dunces.” First I was flattered, thrilled, and then I thought, wait, didn’t both those guys kill themselves?

DC Mandingo Pizza Party

“Me and The DC Mandingos we got a gangbang going on tonight; it is with some old white woman in Bethesda. We’re gonna film it. You should come, man; there’s going to be pizza.”

The Shit the Bed Blues

“She looked at me and said, “You guys actually don’t suck. And you remind me of Billy Corgan, but with hair. Do you have any pot?”

Dwyane Wade Wants to Feel Wanted

“When the Miami Heat offered him a 2-year deal with a 50% pay cut to play for ten million a year instead of his usual ten million, it was his pride more than his pocketbook that got hurt.”

Kevin Love Poem

“Being a really tall and muscular white boy is better than being in a boy band in the late 90’s”

Leland and Dan Wait for Godot at AWP

“Dan Falatko, the author of Condominium, and I met through our publisher, Chicago Center of Literature and Photography. We became fast friends and shared a book-signing table at AWP this year in Los Angeles.”

Wu-Tang Tribute Anthology Submissions Open

“We want 2,000 to 3,000 word stories dealing with anything Wu-Tang Clan related. That could be Gravediggaz themes of horror, cool ass ninja shit, grimy Shaolin monks, slick futuristic science fiction a la Bobby Digital, gritty, or off-the wall crime fiction.”

Parent Yourself Through Writer’s Block

“Whether it is writing or doing any activity that involves you being vulnerable, you are going to have to find ways to push through when you’re ‘not feeling it.’ I think the toughest job for artists of any genre is not creating (good habits and desire will take care of that) but dealing with and managing feelings.”

New Jersey JuggalosB4Hoes Chat Room Transcript

“Below is a leaked transcript from the New Jersey 3rd Circuit Court. It is a conversation of a 3 man chat room group: New Jersey JuggalosB4Hoes. This conversation contains very offensive material and Clash Media does not support these sentiments or the Juggalos.”

Hours vs. Days / Job vs. Hobby

“It’s not really about writing every day. I do write every day and it helps me a lot to stay in a rhythm, but it’s not about days for me. It is about hours.”

Chaturbate: A Step Toward Singularity

“I click on it because there are hot naked women masturbating and then there are 50 different girls, guys, and transsexuals, and couples all getting down in a little screen.

It looks like the Hollywood Squares of porn.”

Dear Adam Gase

“There are two types of Miami Dolphin fans: one group that needs something to do on a Sunday, because they are still high on coke from partying Saturday night; the other is people who equate home, family, and regional pride with watching the Miami Dolphins on Sunday.”

A Sonnet Inspired By ‘Spring’

“An aimless young man (Lou Taylor Pucci) takes an impromptu trip to Italy and becomes involved with an alluring genetics student (Nadia Hilker) who harbors a transformative secret.”

My New Year’s Resolution Is To Be Less Of An Asshole

“There are different types of assholes. I’m a Steve Jobs type of asshole, that’s when if I see something that I find fucking stupid or not up to par, I want tell the person how fucking stupid they are and then shame them for being so god damn moronic.”

Empathy

“I have high levels of empathy. Not Will Graham level, but up there.”

The Ghosts of Jerking Off: A Christoph Carol

“My laptop was positioned perfectly on my bed. I was looking at Tubegalore.com but I was not sure what topic to pick when I heard a ghostly voice echo in my studio apartment, “Chrisssstoppph, Chrissstoph, do not jerk off. For I am the ghost of jerk off past.”

All Fetuses Go To Heaven: A Children’s Story on Abortion

“Once upon a time in a magical place named New Jersey there was a young woman named Jane. She had pretty blond hair and liked to drink magical juice that made her forget how boring College was: a place where people read magical books to make their brains bigger…”

The Politics of Amazon vs. Apple

“For better or worse I see things very much through the lens of International Relations. I see the distribution of digital art as similar to the politics of the Cold War.”