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Author Archive

Nothing is Fair in the Apocalypse: It Comes at Night

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There is no such thing as fair during times like this.”

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WHY I STILL ENJOY XMAS EVEN THOUGH I AM A JADED MOFO

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“I can’t stand most holidays. The idea of having to sit around with folks I spend most of the year trying to avoid out of social obligation always sets me on edge.”

HORROR ANTHOLOGY MUST HAVE: ETERNAL FRANKENSTEIN

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“The beauty of this anthology is how varied the voices are.”

TOP TEN BODY HORROR MOVIES

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“There was no way I could do a body horror list and not include Brian Yuzna’s Society.”

ANTIBIRTH IS MY NEW DATE MOVIE

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“Sometimes I use movies as a gauge whether or not it’s going to work out between me and a romantic partner.”

A COLLAPSE OF HORSES BY BRIAN EVENSON GIVES STEPHEN KING A RUN FOR HIS MONEY

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“What’s remarkable about these stories is Evenson’s ability to turn familiar, mundane things into objects of terror.”

SHORT STORY SATURDAY: WAX-MAN

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“Screams filled the kitchen of the frat house.”

I SAW ROB ZOMBIE’S 31 AND NOW MY MOUTH TASTES LIKE REGRET

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“There’s a midget clown covered in swastikas that speaks Spanish, because why not?”

Masturbation is Punishable by Toaster

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“Single people are annoying and people in relationships are annoying.”

Santa Sangre: An Appreciation

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“Where other films would shy away from the weird or cut away before things get ugly, Jodorowsky grabs the viewer by the collar and drags them into the thick of it.”