Aleister Black is Dope, and Ciampa Hates Signs

Drew Buxton 

Aleister Black is badass and has a badass entrance. He stayed undefeated last night by beating Killian Dain in a title eliminator. It’s hard to imagine him not going over at Takeover: New Orleans. It’s time to put the belt on him, and the night before Wrestlemania is the perfect spot to do it. He’ll be cutting more promos than he ever has. I think he’s up for it, but I can’t see why they don’t just give him a manager/mouthpiece and let him remain quiet and mysterious. Someone from his past could appear, someone who has some sort of power over him. I wouldn’t even be upset with a shameless Paul Bearer knockoff (Please give us a Paul Bearer knockoff).

My prediction for The Authors of Pain vs. TM61 match was only partially correct. AOP won but it was far from a squash. This is promising for TM61 in terms of how booking views them, but I don’t understand the logic. Why have your monster heels look vulnerable in the first round? If you want to make TM61 look strong, why not have them advance against someone else? Have them beat Moustache Mountain for christ’s sake.

Other things that happened:

-We got promos from Heavy Machinery and Sanity hyping their respective upcoming matches in the first round of the Dusty Rhodes Classic. The HM guys are fucking funny, but I think I’m out on Sanity. There’s no story there. Their whole gimmick seems to be laughing crazily. They need to stand for something besides just chaos. Make them a proper cult or gang with a philosophy.

-Bianca Belair squashed a girl. It’s still early but I’m high on Belair. She’s athletic and has a great look.

-Tommaso Ciampa came out dragging his crutch behind him. The crowd booed him and chanted for Johnny Gargano. Ciampa tried to wait them out but got frustrated and spiked the microphone on the mat. He left the ring to retrieve said microphone and climbed back in then got more frustrated and left the ring again. He took a Johnny Gargano sign from a fan in the stands and ripped it in half and proceeded to beat it with his crutch.

 

BIO: Last year Drew Buxton spent more money on spilled cappuccino, in cafes from one side of this world to the other, than you made. His stuff has been featured in Hobart, Vice, Vol. 1 Brooklyn, Funhouse, Mayday, and Hypertext among other publications. Find his stuff at drewbuxton.com.

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