Kevin Love Poem

Being a really tall and muscular white boy
is better than being in a boy band in the late 90’s.
Man, I would have been dope in a boy band.
If I was from O-Town instead of Cali,
Timberlake and I would be recording
an N’SYNC comeback album.
Instead of that goofy motherfucker with braids,
I could have been
the hot tall guy with a beard.

Basketball is easier than singing though,
especially when you’re 7-foot
and can make threes.
Nowitzki is softer than me
with worse defense
and even he has a ring.

It’s even easier when you got
Lebron and Kyrie.
We are bigger stars
than any boy band.
My dad thinks boy bands are retarded.
He said it’s not real music like The Beatles.
He loves that old ass band.

My dad is my biggest fan.
Last year, he’d always call me up
and say I’m the George Harrison of the Cavs.
He’d say that his leads took the band to the next level,
but after Game 5, he didn’t even call.
He just texted me: Nice game, Ringo.


About Christoph Paul

Nice Jewish boy who writes mean books. Publisher of New English Press. Rep'd by Veronika Boom and writes Bizarro Erotica as Mandy DeSandra.

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